Wednesday 7 August 2013

A Spiritual Path: Taking Leaps

This begins a series of posts that I would like to write about my spiritual journey. As the inspiration comes up, I plan to divulge. Enjoy.

A few years back I took a huge scary leap. I quit my job. Not because it was horrible, not because I hated it. I felt like I was at a dead end, but that was the nature of fashion industry in 2009. The Madoff thing had just broken out and New Yorkers were hurting for money, or at least perceivably so. No one was shopping. Yadayada.

I had become increasingly involved at a Manhattan Yoga center, and started to feel the pull to do a teacher training course. I was looking for the light in all that depressive desire for wealth and power. So I did it, and I had complete faith that everything would work out just fine. And it did.

The leap: Quit job. The success: Fill time with something profound, healthy, and foundational. That of course was the Yoga teacher training course. When you have a strong feeling about something and you go for it, everything falls into place.

I remember walking to Macy's one morning... I was walking along the backside of the building by the loading dock. I had this day dream, a really strong day dream. I saw an image of Swami Vishnudevananda smiling. Swami Vishnu was the founder of the course that I was about to experience. I felt his peace. It must not have been two weeks later that I gave my notice.

This is all not to say that I didn't have my fears and anxieties. I did. Fear and anxiety were two of my biggest battles. At the same time, I had a great calm in my heart; a calm that pervaded understanding. I believe that when you get this feeling, its truly a gift that cannot be ignored.

Wow and what a transformative month the TTC was. I don't ever really remember missing NYC. Maybe I missed my independence as we were moving with our group of 20 to every morning meditation, class, lecture, meal, and all. I was so blown away by the knowledge I was coming into. This was a major segue-way into a deep mystical experience for me... which continues...

I think I've mastered the big leaps. It's the small ones I still need work on. For instance, giving my husband instructions on how to move the clothes line in the morning because I am afraid that the line will drag on the ground and the clothes still wont be dry. These are the small fears I am working on. I am going to make a conscious effort to overcome them. Let's see what happens.



Here's a before and after sample. (The weekend before I left for the training, then the TTC graduation). Do you notice a difference? I'm not so excited about posting pictures unabashedly of myself, but for some reason I feel the need to do so. I feel that these pictures reflect the change that took place on the inside.

 







As I searched through pictures to offer these, I noticed how dramatically life has improved for me over the last decade. I owe much of this to my dedication to the practice of yoga, but mostly because these practices have deepened my connection to Spirit. I grew up in the church and was always a big fan of Jesus. But my perspective now is like sshpeww* (sound effect coupled with my arms shooting out to the sides to show you how much my mind has opened and grown).

Okay so back to small fears. Overcoming them now. Will let you know which next reflection comes up.

AAUUUUMMMM.

Jenny

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